5 Things I Can't Control (and 5 Things I Can)

5 Things I Can’t Control (and 5 Things I Can)

1. My past trauma. It’s happened (hence the word “past”). That can only mean moving on from it. The last has no place in my heart. Make peace without dwelling and move on.

2. How others act. I can’t control anybody else and it's exhausting to even try.

3. Time. It’ll pass. No matter what you do. You can’t delay time or speed it up. Just enjoy it as it goes along.

4. The beliefs of others. Whether it is religious or political, others have their own convictions and you have to respect that, just as you’d want them to respect yours. This doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy a good debate every now and then but you can’t control the thoughts of others. It’s futile to try.

5. The weather

5 Things You Can Control

1. My attitude. I recently met someone who had OCD but who had the most positive attitude. I’m always whining about being tired but they (gently) pointed out that at least I was free to walk and breathe independently. The toll my medications take on me really isn’t that much comparatively.

2. My diet. Although I can’t control how hungry the meds make me, I can control what I eat in response. Yesterday I went to KFC which was not the smartest choice. Eating salmon at home is always a wise move. And hey, the sushi isn’t fried.

3. The company I keep. I try to surround myself with people who build me up and don’t tell my secrets or spread rumors about me. By choosing your company carefully you eliminate half (no, more than half) the drama.

4. The movies I watch. When I was 15 I got in over my head watching disturbing movies. And I’m not even talking about horror movies. I’m talking about soul-damaging movies. The world seems so much more friendly since I stopped watching them. Less sinister, more gentle. I don’t like that kind of cynicism.

5. What I wear. We don’t go through life in uniforms. The truth is what we wear says a lot of about us. I wear a lot of band T-shirts, horror movie shirts and alottttt of black. I used to show a lot of skin but I don’t do that anymore because it presents something about me that isn’t true. Today I present a lot that is more me and I’m proud to do so.

There is a lot we can’t control. But we can focus our attentions on what we can’t. And that will propel us forward.