Gretchen Rubin's Resolutions

Perhaps Gretchen Rubin is most well known for her happiness project. She pinpointed areas in her life- love, parenthood, energy- and picked resolutions for those areas which were supposed to improve happiness. She underwent alot of resolutions but here are ten I enjoyed and utilized and may even suggest for you.

• Go to sleep earlier

I take a number of evening meds that usually put me to sleep about 45 minutes after I take them. I usually fall into a very deep sleep bordering on a coma. The later I take my pills, the more difficult it is to get me out of bed in the morning so I try to take them before nine or my morning is shot. Even if you aren’t feeling tired, going through the motions and getting ready for bed can put you in sleep mode.

• Act more energetic

There are times where someone wakes me up (or, in the case of college, my alarm clock) and I lie there and think “No way am I getting up. I have a million things to do today and I can’t do any of them. I can’t even brush my teeth” Seriously, brushing my teeth is Mount Everest. But a lot of time I didn’t have much of a choice. But I noticed that if I tackled a task (including brushing my teeth) with an attitude of energy I could fool myself into thinking I was energetic enough to face the next thing on my to-do list. It was easier to tackle tasks one task at a time.

• Give proofs of love

Gretchen talks about how she expresses love to her husband, Jamie. I try to do the same thing with  my boyfriend, Justin. Justin cooks all my meals on weekends (provided we don’t eat out). We often grocery shop together to get the ingredients (he’ll let me pick out drinks and cereal). While Justin cooks we play music and listen to Reddit Stories on Smosh. I try to help out with the dishes as much as possible. Other proofs of love: giving him back scratches and cuddles every time we spend the night together or keep him company when he walks his dog. I feel like I  don’t do enough for him but I’m always on the look out to make him believe he is the man of my dreams.

• Launch a blog

Done! It originally started as a website (it’s still a website) but then I fell behind on the website and kept up with the blog. I blog five days a week. I do wish I had more comments (In my two and a half years of keeping a website I have had one comment. A very positive comment but one comment) or some feedback (what do my listeners like hearing about? Self help? Books? Movie reviews? My personal life? News about mental illness?). I love the blog but sometimes it feels like a diary not a platform. Or like I’m shouting into the void.

• Take time for projects

Ever since I was a kid, I loved projects. I would push the limits of my bedtime working on my latest project- usually, a book or a craft of some kind, sometimes a present. As I got older we realized my fixation on certain projects was connected to my bipolar disorder. That’s why I don’t just get absorbed in a project I get obsessed and I sometimes have to schedule time to do other things so I don’t burn out or neglect my health/ hygiene.

• Make three new friends

I love this resolution. I still try to adhere to it today. Two years ago  I challenged myself to make three friends every month (I usually met them at open mics and poetry slams or other friend’s parties or concerts). One girl worked in a consignment shop. She was chic and sweet. We went to a place where we could paint pottery together. I painted a frog for my mom. She sits on the stove. I painted a bird for my dad. He sits by the alcohol. And the penguin I kept in my room because he looks like he’s going to murder someone. I met another friend at a cafe. We had coffee but we talked for about two hours. My new friend was very intriguing, wanting to pursue life on a boat. Haven’t seen them in a while but they could be there now. And finally my third girl was a harp player and poet. We met at the Art Cafe and had lunch together.

• Don’t gossip

I once heard (I think it was from Gretchen Rubin) that the things you say about other people are then associated with you. So if you tell someone “Sophie’s a bitch” they will then think (maybe even subconsciously) that you are the bitchy one. So that is one big reason not to gossip. Besides the fact that it’s just plain wrong. If you are dying to spill some cruel tea, that’s what a diary is for.

• Indulge in a modest splurge

I have a weekly allowance of $100. Occasionally I make money off my writing but I certainly could not support myself on that alone. I save most of my money for activities with friends like spa days or dinner or poetry days or church retreats. However, if you encounter something you can afford and is truly not out of your price range I encourage you to treat yourself and buy it. That’s how I end up with most of my craft supplies which I assure you that I use. 

• Spend out

I have a story. A long time ago I gave my little brother special shampoo that looked like it came in a blue crayola crayon bottle . He loved it so much, it was actually touching. It sat in the bathroom. It sat there. It sat there. Maybe for ten years it sat there. When he went to use it it had spoiled. Which kind of makes me want to cry (going through a tough time, give me a break). But the lesson is to use something up instead of saving the good china for a rainy day,

• Give positive reviews

Gretchen once pointed out that it is easy for people to complain about something. It is not as popular to give “positive reviews” or be enthusiastic about something. But this is lesson to give good reviews when you can. To point out the high points of a movie instead of grumbling about how bad it was. To recommend the book you read to your best friend. To thank the waiter for his prompt service without complaining about the burned onion rings. When I try to give positive reviews, I usually feel more positive myself.

I highly recommend The Happiness Project, the book these resolutions are from. Gretchen Rubin gives more attention to each of them and elaborates on how they could help you in your life. Please stick with us for the rest of the week as finish Gretchen Rubin week.