What Does the Holiday Season Mean For You

It doesn’t matter if you are Christian, Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist or agnostic. The holiday season means different things to everyone and yet many people share similar experiences. Here are some questions you should ask yourself this holiday season:

• How can I be the best version of myself this holiday season? 

Often this means taking care of yourself by not drinking too much eggnog (it’s hard I know), not staying up too late and not getting embarrassingly drunk at the office party.  However if you want to go the extra mile you will respect the boundaries you set ahead of time. “I will help Mom with the turkey and bring a side dish of my choice” “I will go to Mary's Christmas party but be home by midnight” “I will get stocking suffers for my little cousins but not the $500 Lego set they want”

• How can I get in the holiday spirit when I'm not feeling festive?

Put some Christmas music on a Playlist.  Brainwash yourself into believing the lyrics by listening to it in the shower, while you knit,  as you fall asleep.  I love all the Christmas and holiday classics. Some ones you might not have heard of are “Jingle Baby” by Stephanie Mills “You Make Me Feel Like Christmas” by Gwen Stephanie “Santa Tell Me” by Ariana Grande and “I Don't Know What Christmas Is” from Guardians of the Galaxy. When you've got the tunes down get that decorating started.  You'll feel much better with a tree in your living room trust me. Then you can start an ornament collection. Finally,  spend time with children.  The way children view Christmas is magical.  Maybe it'll rub off on you. 

• How can I minimize family drama?

The holidays are notorious for family drama. Luckily I have never had this problem.  My family doesn't have drama. But if we did my advice would again be to set boundaries.  Practice saying things firmly like “I don't feel comfortable talking about that. However I would love to tell you about what I'm learning in school” or “I prefer to keep that private.  How are you doing?” If you do it enough times it should throw nosy relatives off the scent.  Another suggestion is not to stay with your family.  If you are coming from out of town consider getting a hotel room. It may be expensive (correction: it's the holidays so it will be expensive) but it might be worth it if you are dealing with toxic relatives.

• How can I make time for myself this holiday season?

Take time to yourself every day.  In the morning tell yourself explicitly what acts of self care you will perform. “Tonight I will take a bubble bath” or “This morning I will take the dog for an extra long walk around my favorite park” Remember to keep tabs on your physical health and your mental health. If you feel  yourself getting burnt out, take a “nap” (really it could mean your just lying on your bed watching cat videos. No one’s gotta know). Obligations will come up. Feel free to say no if it cuts into  your time.  You won’t be your best self if you’re running on empty.

• How can I avoid packing on the pounds?

As my therapist says the holidays are hard for people with disordered eating. But even if you do have a good relationship with food, it can be hard to eat healthy around the holidays. My mom tells me there are three days I can eat with abandon: Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve (which we celebrate with my mom’s family), and Christmas Day (which we celebrate with my dad’s family). I also eat on New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day. See how easily three days slip into five? My advice would be (depending how comfortable you are with food) pick four days to indulge. The other days limit yourself to what you would glean a healthy amount (and this varies depending on your health and your diet).

• How can I give without going broke?

Unless it’s a stocking stuffer (like a rubix cube ornament for my brother), I’m not buying it. I get a set amount of money from my parents every week and I couldn’t possibly purchase presents for all the people I love. I do buy presents for my boyfriend Justin. Last year I assembled a basket of his favorite stuff- a Marvel T-shirt, a book on famous directors, a comic book, a Lego kit, special sketching pencils and a set of colored pencils. He loved it. But he’s probably the only one I’d do that for. This year I’m making several kinds of presents for all my friends and family. I’m making affirmation cards, poetry cards, mental health cards, altered cards, Diamond Art, decorated bookmarks and collages. I am up to my ears in crafting. Of course I do have to spend money on craft supplies but because I really enjoy crafting and seeing the pleasure my homemade gifts give people it’s worth it.

• How can I patch up my spiritual life?

For me the holidays are a very spiritual time for me. It is the time I feel the most connected to Jesus. No matter what your faith denomination I would encourage you to dedicate at least ten minutes to your God/ deity/ whatever you believe in. It is extremely fulfilling but it’s something often lost during the hustle and bustle of the holidays. We must remember not to neglect the true meaning of Christmas (or any other holiday). 

• How can I handle post holiday blues?

When I was a kid, I would often become let down after Christmas. It was like a drug crash but on a kid-friendly level. As I got older I saw other things I could look forward to after Christmas. Like in seventh grade I scored the lead in the school play. That got me past post holiday blahs. In senior year of high school it was the fact that I had gotten into my dream college with a scholarship. As I’ve gotten older it’s gotten easier because I realized putting all your stock in one day is dangerous. However, this year because I’ve been so busy with presents I was worried once they were all done I’d be bored and empty. So to be proactive (and I encourage you to do this too) I made a list of activities I would enjoy and have time to do after Christmas. Some things on my list are doing an hour of piano a day, working on three knitting projects, playing my Switch, and working on my anthology. Which has yet to be named.

Don’t worry friends. Whether its family or money or diet, God (yours and mine) will be with us this holiday season to guide us during this wonderful yet turbulent time.