A Smorgasbord of Hope
- 3 days ago
- 2 min read
Here are some yearnings that maybe will come true, maybe won’t, probably won’t but we can always hope:
To make a difference with my writing
To lose thirty pounds. I weighed myself for the first time since I started the diet and trust me it is no small feat. I have a deadline. I want to lose the weight by September for my friend’s wedding. But i know it does take a while to shed the pounds (remember I did this before).
To have them turn Story of Hope into a major motion picture
To have a bathtub I can fit in (preferably with stairs)
More opportunities to have sex (with my boyfriend. Not just with anyone)
A higher sex drive (on that note)
My cousin Mary-Kate to live closer
To successfully run a book club at a retirement home (I’m trying)
Oprah to pick one of my books for her book club
A life with Justin (living together, getting married)
A beautiful wedding of my own
The ability to travel without my OCD flaring up
Find a job that doesn’t stress me out and that I’m confident I can do
Staying friends with my current friends forever
Never breaking my sobriety
To feel safe. There are nights when I feel utterly terrified from people from my past coming back to haunt me
Put the past behind me
Have children in my life (not biologically) that I can be a mother figure to. I can’t have children of my own and I’m not going to adopt but I want to be an influential, mother figure to the children in my life
To be less hard on myself
Run writing workshops (I might do this at the retirement home as well)
Attend writing retreats (since my mom’s throwing me a big birthday party I don’t know if they are still on board with letting me go to a writing retreat this year but I did get a tentative yes)
Feel bad about the fact that I’m not a “real” author (meaning I am self-published and not with a publisher and the fact that I don’t have an agent)
Be brave about sharing my life experiences
Be less of a perfectionist
Benefit from mindfulness (which so far hasn’t done much for me)
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