Pledges

   Things I Pledge Never to Do

• Plastic surgery (unless it’s for medical reasons. This includes Botox). When I was in college my body image was so poor I was thinking about breast implants (as if I could actually afford that) until a friend talked me out of it. I realize most guys like a natural look. Oh sure there are guys that will do anything for a girl with triple E breasts. There’s even a fetish called bimbofication. But I am not a bimbo. And my boobs (and face and butt and tummy) are staying exactly the way they are.

• Have an abortion. I don’t judge people who have had abortions. People have reasons and they are put in desperate situations. But I would consider myself pro-lfe if someone asked and i know personally I  could never have an abortion. I could never raise a child either. My mind is a mess and it wouldn’t be fair to the baby. But there are many homes looking for a baby to love. I know alot of people think its unfair to bring a baby into such a messed up world. Newsflash: the world has always been messed up. It’s never been an easy place to raise a child. There have been wars, times of economic depression and times of disease. What are we supposed to do, just not have children anytime things get difficult?

• Do drugs (this includes alcohol and marijuana). I have been sober for over ten years now and I intend to stay that way for the rest of my life. It would feel a betrayal to myself to break that sobriety for one or two throwaway nights of fun. I don’t think being high is amusing, I think it’s kind of pathetic to be honest. I can respect people who use drugs to numb their pain but people who do it just for shits and giggles have no idea how dumb they sound. I shudder to think how silly I used to sound.

• Make my child feel unloved. I’m not going to have a child. At least I don’t plan to. But if I did I would never make my  child feel unloved. My parents have gotten mad at me. I made a significant amount of mistakes especially in my teens. But I never doubted that they loved me. In fact, if they didn’t love me they probably wouldn’t have cared at all. They would have just let me do whatever I wanted. It would have been easier. But because they cared so much they made sure I got a consequence for my actions so I wouldn’t do it again.

• I pledge not to be “that girl” at the gym. This was inspired (today) by the girls I see at the gym every day who are practically naked. I’m sorry but there is no way you are lifting weights in a sports bra and booty shorts because it’s more “comfortable” for you. No you have a great physique and you are looking to show it off. Just admit it. I used to dress thirsty too  when I had a nice body. I wouldn’t do it again because I don’t show off my body anymore. 

                                                       Things I Pledge to Do

• Learn basic household chores so I can have my own place. I do my own laundry and can make a menu of eggs, cold cereal and coffee (I could start my own diner). I clean my room when it starts to feel like its eating me. But I have alot of things to learn. I will need tips on vacuuming and cleaning the toilets. And I really could expand my menu.

• Stay true to who I am, faith wise. Christians get a bad rep. They are persecuted for their faith and piety. I don’t pretend to be perfect. Most people who meet me are actually surprised at my unwavering faith in the Lord. In the past I have questioned God for putting me through so much pain. But I have realized God has always been there for me when I  need it. He hasn’t answered my questions. But he isn’t obligated to. If I knew everything it wouldn’t be called faith.

• Be there for my family.  I love my friends. I consider them part of my tribe. I believe we will be friends for life. My friend Adam says if you have known someone for seven years or longer then they will be with you for life. I really hope so. But I will always be there for my family, looking out for my cousins and my brother. Several years ago my little cousin had a baby out of wedlock which kind of rocked my conservative family. But now his child (and the child’s mother) are welcomed at family gatherings. I would have  been there for him either way.

• Lose weight. It sounds like an empty promise at this point but it is not I swear. I am making progress albeit slowly. It’s hard and my job makes it harder because there is an excess of chips and cookies and doughnuts and when I’m at work I’m stressed as hell so I tend to eat. I know I need to train my brain to somehow think differently. To reroute the instinct to reach for another bag of chips or another piece of candy. You will just have to stick by my side while i figure it out.