Things I Say Yes to In the Summer

Things I Say Yes To In the Summer:

• People gathered in the kitchen

• Leisurely walks in nature

• Someone doing something really nice for me

• Reading a literary novel in a cozy place (bean bag chair perhaps)

• An outdoor BBQ and pool party

• “I love you”

• Sunrises and new beginnings

From Now On I Will:

• Stop working before seven o’clock

• Journal as much as I want

• Take breaks (and not just for lunch)

• Take a break to journal, not Instagram

• Get up on time (8:00)

• Try to stay awake to eleven

Things On My Mind:

• How to make a cool collage

• My journals/ OCD

• Missing Scout

• Nuclear War

• Decreasing my medication

• Crime in America

•  The life of Anne Boleyn

• Getting my book of short stories published

• Finding a good book

Lies My OCD Tells Me: 

• Something will happen to your journals

• Something will happen to my family

• I’m fat and therefore unattractive

• My boobs aren’t big enough

Even time I have a pool party coming up there is alot of pressure. I worry will my boobs be big enough? Will there be skinny girls in thong bikinis? Will I be the dowdy housewife, the flatchested whale? Wow, I’ve got a lot of ammo.

Most days aren’t all bad or all good. And both bad and good days lend to healing. Take today for example. I had a beautiful morning and journaled. I worked hard (aka wrote) most of the day but listened to music and didn’t sneak any snacks. BUt then the feeling of emptiness and melancholy kicked in. It’s painful. But you heal from pain.